In today’s episode we’re talking about giving and receiving. It’s really a matter of where we’re coming from, both in the giving and receiving. Are we coming from love, joy and the natural extension of sharing that comes from that? Or are we giving and receiving with the expectation of getting something in return?
Like if you give someone something, you expect them to say thank you, yes? Why?
So often, when we give, we have an agenda attached. We give and expect a response that validates us. Do we give out of guilt, expectation or obligation?
Do we expect certain gifts or behaviors from others as proof of their love of care?
There are so many social norms that can get in the way giving for the simple joy of the experience of giving. It’s Christmas, Valentines Day, birthdays, etc., so there’s like this built-in expectation that if we love someone, we’ll give them something special to prove we thought of them. Right? Most of us have had moments when we recognized an inner resistance to these social norms.
Generosity is a natural part of our human condition — of our divine condition — of the natural out-flowing of love, which seeks to share and join with another.
Expectation robs us of the opportunity for our natural generosity to come up for us. We might act, but our heart isn’t fully engaged. Can you relate?
It feels yummy to give, yes? That’s the gift we’re already receiving. Whether it’s a behavior, a gesture or a physical gift, it is always our heart we are giving. Are we giving it away?
What we want to emphasize is the dynamic energy of giving and receiving with love.
When you change your behavior because somebody expects it of you, you are robbing yourself, and them, of the real you.
When someone or social norms seem to ask a particular behavior from you, you can step back, step away from the context, and find what’s true and authentic within. And accept that request from a genuine place of gratitude and love. And then respond in joy and generosity.
Let’s talk a minute about receiving. Every gift, be it monetary, a smile, a gesture or behavior, is really an extension of love. It might come through looking like a call for love — like when someone is expecting something from you. But it is alway love looking to meet itself within the exchange.
True receiving is never about the gift someone is giving or doing thing they want you to do — it is receiving the person with love.
Receiving is never about the thing or the request. It is about receiving the person’s extension of themselves.
If someone is offering anything to you, eye to eye contact, a gift, a smile, a hand, an opinion — anything that someone is extending, to just receive it as a gift of unity together is the greatest joy. The thing doesn’t matter. The person the does. That is what receiving is for. That is what giving is for.
There are always two things going on when we are having an exchange with someone.
There is the response of our inner being that recognizes the chance for unity. Then there’s this ego or programmed response that jumps in and judges the exchange. And if we listen to that voice in our head we miss the authentic experience being gifted us in that moment.
Finally, we all just want to be seen and accepted and loved just for who we are!
This is the purpose all giving and receiving.
If we let social norm expectations or our judgement of what we think someone else’s motivation for giving is, we miss the true exchange possible.
It feels yummy just to receive everything from everyone and every single way we are being gifted life in countless ways.
Have a yummy week & a yummy day!